Being okay with being “un-okay”

One of my commanders in the Army band once told a story about a fellow he was serving with playing a solo in a concert.

I guess this person had been around the block a few times, judging by how he described this scene.

Apparently this guy played the solo well enough, but made a few mistakes along the way. If I recall correctly, he played trumpet, and any trumpeter knows that a live performance – especially outside – is kind of a crap shoot. You just don’t know what you’re going to get.

What stuck with me from the commander’s story is how the guy reacted to the feedback he got after the concert. He simply accepted people’s gratitude for his performance.

He didn’t say anything like, “Well, I flubbed the high B, and my intonation was a bit spotty in places, but overall I guess I’m okay with it.”

He merely said, “Thank you, thanks for coming,” things along that line and that was it.

No drama, no ego.

He did his best with what he had that day, didn’t make excuses for his mistakes.

In other words, he was okay with being un-okay. And people loved him for it.

That’s quite a contrast from the utterly overused and abused concept of “authenticity” that everyone is always preaching.

Many people use that word only because their favorite guru uses it, they think it sounds cool, so they may as well use it too.

It doesn’t exactly scream “authenticity,” does it.

Oftentimes it’s our reactions to our mistakes, our faults, that define us. If we try to excuse them, or blame them on environment, circumstances, our father, etc. you’re kind of shooting yourself in the foot.

Sometimes what appears to be a failure in the eyes of mortal man is the greatest success.